With tongue firmly in cheek. Please don’t get your Chaddies in a bunch
- To the one and only Knotty Baba : A life time supply of state of the art, hair removal creams.
One look at those tropical rain forests spouting from those puny arm pits is enough to dish out a thousand deaths. What speak of slashing heads, when not chanting in thy nation’s glory?
God says Granted.
2. To our Esteemed Make in India PM : A life time supply of travel vouchers ( First Class But of course) for vrromming around the world. BTW any country left on the map so far? May be Burkina Faso .
God says Will be Done.
3. To Maha Ma Sonia : A Thirty day reckoner on How to Let Go and Let him Grow! Baba Log is gonna be shortly Old Hat. Hair line is thinning and senility is setting in.
God says No Issues
4. To Mommie knows Best RaGa : A new best seller straight from the author’s lap top “Sing a New Tune. How not to put your foot in the mouth constantly” A growling foreword by the one and only CB
God says Ok
5. To the Muffler Man : A chance to pen down his own rocking memoir “ Oddly it will all Even Out”
God says With Pleasure
6. To Rakhi Sa Want : A life time supply of Ceiling Pankhas ( saying Fan is no longer Kosher) and Portable AC Units. So that she can chill and give us more earth shattering Gyan
God says Absolutely.
7. To Enfant Terrible Kanhaiyya : An immediate patent on “Hum leke rahenge Aazadi” Lest lesser mortals like Yatra and other citizens adopt it. Apparently it was our clarion call for Independence before 1947. Oh Drats!
God says Given.
8. To Indian Cricketers : The Wall None better
God says Fantastic. ASAP.
9. To Noisy Arnab Goswami : The Nation Wants to know if it is possible for him to be silent for a Nano second.
At this point The Almighty throws up his hands and declares “I am Only GOD”