Kids and their Sassy talks

anupama lores-44

We kill ourselves to get those lil rats outs and wait desperately for them to spout wisdom!

What happens next? Read On…

When Scintillating Sonny took his Mom AllJazz for Dinner…..

Scintillating Sonny : “We leave in 5 minutes and 5 means 5! 

Mom can you speed up the process? Stop wasting time with online capers”

AllJazz shuts her laptop wondering how fast the first laptop had grown, quietly changes and comes out all beaming!

Scintillating Sonny : “Are you going out wearing THAT? 

Mom, Please Remember we are doing fine dining!”

Paradise Lost.

AllJazz quietly changes into something that passes the hard taskmaster’s scrutiny. 

Paradise Regained.

Now thankfully the attention shifts to hmm_Husband!

Shaking his head, Scintillating Sonny : “Dad could you please please put on a shirt? And No shorts please!”

Darling Dotty had always been quick on the uptake. She quickly rushes in, to change into Sonny’s fave colors.

All Set Then

But it still goes on. 

No selfies. No checking in. No mobile chatting. Talk softly. Put the cutlery properly at the end. 

Boy! Life is a Full circle ain’t it?

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AllJazz’s thirteen year old daughter while wolfing down the dinner comments ” mom you are good cooker! But if we put too much pressure on you, you blow your whistle real hard!”

…hmm talk about left handed compliment 🙂

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It was that time of the month! When all the grey strands searched and given a makeover. All the arsenal was ready. Color, brush etc and AllJazz got down to business. Imagine her horror when Darling Dotty screamed, “Papa! don’t disturb mom! she is busy youngifying herself!”

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Darling Dotty croons “Bro, I am Big Eyed. You are Big Nosed and Mom is Big Mouthed!”

After a huge all around silence ” oh I meant, big lipped” 

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Hmm with such uplifting kids and their wisecracks, one can be very sure to be always grounded.

No horns on the head!

It always comes back, with interest.

Love it like crazy. #everydayisamothersday

Ma 0H Tujhe Salaam

AnyunI

 

Many dark ages ago, there was Mother India who killed her Paapi Puttar for violating the code of conduct of an ideal son.

Then came Dee war zoned mother Nirupa Roy who always chose good over towering evil.

But these are modern times with instant and constant connectivity. 

Motherhood has changed so much with technology. We have newer and smarter categories now.

Groupie Mom : She is part of so many groups, gathering so much instant knowledge from all those dripping with gyaan from their toe nail type forums. Where does she have the time to absorb all that and test drive on her poor unsuspecting children is matter for serious discussion!

Facebook Mom: Every single minute of her child’s life is carefully documented and immediately uploaded for public consumption. Whether it is eating food, changing clothes or good old poop sesssion. Likes are matter of life and death and unsavory comments are fought tooth and nail. It’s simply safe to like and leave. ( better still unfriend! But if you do that, when you do upload stuff, you may not be left with many to ‘like’ )

Whatsapp Mom: All the test schedules are whatsapped to the core groups, husband, in-laws, driver, maid etc. To the poor tutor, in triplicate and the plan of action ahead with all the moody emoticons added in for good measure. Those two blue ticks are her real silent stress busters. Any time is a good time for “I will Whatsapp you!

Google Mom: “Chalo Google kar lete hain!” is her go-to mantra which she chants at least 108 times in a day. What was she doing before Larry and Sergey brainstormed, we will never know!

Twitter Mom: The storm that she can create with those 140 characters is seen to be believed! A buzz has to be generated each time a brain wave hits her. Of course after tagging moms who think alike.

And there are those Snapchat moms, Skype moms, Instagram moms, ‘I will connect with you’ moms who add great flavour to mommiedom

And last but not the least

We are Like This Only Mom: Chilled out and carefree, she isn’t unduly worried about stuff. Her basic guiding philosophy is “This too shall pass“. Nothing really moves her including earthquakes. She sometimes suffers from the delusions that she is left behind but that is transitory. In the next instant, she is back to normal letting her children be.

Whatever may be her type, she always wants the best for her darling. That is the only truth

And there are moms like moiTotally Useless.  Who bombard the poor world with useless tripe, while sporting an invisible halo on the head.

And so you have been forewarned!!!