“Seriously? Do you cook yourself?”
“No! I cook by myself 😊!”
“Haan vahi! Same to Same. So you must having a live-in help. No?”
“Nope, I have just one part-timer to pitch in..”
“Seriously? So what do you exactly do in life?”
“Well I do loads of interesting stuff, I teach kids, I blog across parental forums, I also write short stories..”
“Oh Oh… (life must be tough! Poor thing, That’s why!!)”
Living where I live, these are some existential dilemmas and perennial questions which you cannot counter saying “I’m doing Ok, Thanq. That’s not the reason I’m slumming really!”
Plus given my OCDs…The time I take to wash spinach or pre soak the lentils, the cook would have finished her routine in 3 houses. And I haven’t even talked about what I do to cauliflower’s florets. (“You see, those tiny florets can be presoaked in warm saline water or…”)
So even for the cooks of the Condo, I am a taboo
To add colour and to keep peace, I trawl the food channels
What I have understood after losing countless hours and many non-regenerative cells, is that…
1) Indian food per se is unfit and is fully loaded with fat!
2) Oatifying n BellPepperizing, redeems the said offending dish
3) Anything is garlic addable including Gunjiya🤔🙃
4) Throw in some exotic leaves like Arugula, Dill or even the humble greens of onions…the fit meter simply zooms up. Don’t forget to olive oil it 😀
5) Everything is baked (standard 170 C 15 min) or Non sticked. 2 drops of Olive oil does the trick!
6) Those spotless Blingy kitchens, top of the rack accessories! Enough to induce agonizing ennui
7) Who cooks at home with that blinding Pepsodent Smile and Designer Threads, hair all intact?
So I have been thinking, how about Olive oiled kaddu sabzi with baked pooris with bell pepper filling for this Diwali?
My guests might surely vamoose!
Phew. Khana Khazana Tha pehle. ab Smart Cooking Ho Gaya!!