Valentine’s Day is Now Hug-A-Cow Day!

Dear Animal Welfare Board of India,

You have issued an “appeal” to cow lovers to celebrate February 14 as “Cow Hug Day”, saying this exercise “will bring emotional richness” and “increase individual and collective happiness!”

It is a dairying approach no doubt and some will milk it like how!

Firstly I am not going to crib about the consent issues that are being taken for granted. Like always with women, is it understood that random bovine hugs are welcome and keenly awaited? Between the huggee and hugger, who is the cow? For obvious gender reasons, it will be a female! I am not risking gendering this Feb 14 Thingy. Keeping it male and female variety for now. Not Rainbowing it! 

(Will the hugger sport a ‘Cow Lick’ keeping with the spirit of the occasion here? )

Secondly, even if one decides to hug a cow in all earnestness hoping for an emotional Nirvana thereby inviting appeasement of the universe, what if the said divine cultural creature chooses to give the hugger one almighty kick, worse still, plunge those mighty miffed pointy horns into the excited flesh of the poor slob? Will the welfare extend to the silly sufferer? Where is the collective happiness here? Only collectable individual unhappiness!

Thirdly FoMo ho raha hoga!

Romancing might be a dastardly western influence but love is universal. 

The first flush of amour, the unbridled exhilaration of pulsating young souls, and the confessions of the heart are enough to melt even the jaded. Comparing this young feeling to the motherly/maternal vibrations released as a result of bovine embracing is stretching the credulity to the max

I cannot end this rant but wonder, is a woman’s traditional stature less than a cow’s?

Maybe, my comprehension skills are going downhill.

Give a rose

Hug a cow!

Whatever!

One thing’s sure, the resident husband will surely choose me. Searching for a cow in these concrete jungles is an effort!

P.S. A cow was heard Sotto Vocing, ‘Where is the grass? Recycle this plastic heap! Coat, UnCoat!’ 

NaMo Narayanaya!

Believer

Once there was a believer, who was very troubled. 

So he prayed to God very ardently ( We are not getting into the religion part because He isn’t defined by these earthly parameters). But sadly the believer felt, there was no response from Him.

The believer then prayed harder and played all the relevant youtube prayer videos. He still felt God wasn’t responding to his entreaties. He set up a stall, gathered random people, put up speakers and went full blast with his invocations. Still, there was no respite, there was no succour, the man felt. 

After days of fervent community appealing, tired, the man retired to his quarters. He then closed his eyes and with all his heart simply wished for peace, harmony and benevolence all around.

Lo, Behold, the lord Almighty in all his glory was right beside him.

“What took you so long?” the teary-eyed man asked with folded hands.

“Dear child, you thought you were all alone, coping with the vicissitudes of life. But it was I who has been carrying you so far when you gave up fighting with your circumstances. I have never left your side.” The Lord replied, taking out earplugs from his ears. “The noise had become unbearable. I had to resort to these to keep sane. When it had become quieter, I could hear you again and I have come to check on you.”

Intensity matters yes! But of the right kind!

Keep the faith.

( Header Image – Both painting and text created by me )

Different Facets and Shades of ‘I’

Of late, I seem to wallow in unhappiness more often than jump with joy. The prolonged illnesses at home, the cold winter and the exam season I thought were the reasons. But these factors were merely catalysts to a greater problem within. I wasn’t happy inside and hence those small triggers became gigantic. Everything acquired an Everestian aura.

I wanted to write to remain sane but time often slipped out of my hands like sand. Then I saw fellow writers contributing to #Writeapageaday For inspiration I started scrolling through my old blogs. (I had lost my blog akkaacerbic for various technical reasons but managed to access control. )

And the truth hit me like a sledgehammer!

The fault and the answer to my vexing questions lay within me and I was searching for answers outside vainly.

My earlier writing had a zany zest, and irrepressible joy oozing out. Since I was just starting out, I had zero inhibitions, I didn’t belong to any (for lack of better word) coterie, cliques or circles, so I wrote without any filters, to my heart’s content.

As I climbed up the writing ladder and acquired a few milestones, I got tied down. My writing slowly lost its joie de vivre because I got worried about offending people, about not belonging to the right clubs and not being on the correct side of the pecking order. I tried to be politically correct.

And then I fell into the vortex of comparisons. The WA group of celebrated authors that I am part of, bursting with high-achieving creative people is intimidating, to say the least. Makes you wonder about your worthiness as an author.

I know, I know, comparisons are odious. But silly stuff happens

Instead of wondering how writer X manages to be everywhere, I should’ve learned from writer X’s people-skills, connectivity

I should have also imbibed the tenacity of the ageless inspiration

I should have also emulated the SM capabilities of the young ones instead of getting enervated by their boundless energy

I should have taken the positives from my peers and the very accomplished and improved upon my own lacunae rather than wallow in debilitating self-doubt.

I should have remembered each journey with its own challenges, trials and tribulations is different and highly individualistic. One should never stop taking pride in how far one has come rather than worry only about how much further to go!

And most importantly, I should have retained the zing and the joy of putting to words the inner churnings. Such a catharsis, that exercise is!

I hope I have started a step in the right direction with this piece.

W-Wood Apple or Velakkaya

 

In this series, I will write about South Indian Food – Typically Telugu food

#SouthieSaga – Welakkai Pacchadi

Select a ripe wood apple by sniffing

Scoop the pulp inside, by shell breaking

Add some oil to a hot pan

Fry some red chillies, Chana Dal and Udad, till they tan

Now add mustard seeds, hing  and curry leaves

Also keep aside some chopped coriander leaves

When the seasoning splutters, grind to a coarse paste

Add the scoop of wood apple and blend again, after adding salt to taste

Take it out in a small jar and add chopped coriander

Serve with hot rice, you just sampled a forgotten dish dear!

U-Upma

 

In this series, I will write about South Indian Food – Typically Telugu food

#SouthieSaga – Upma

A mouth watering semolina preparation is this Upma

Not an easy dish to ace, Oh By Ma,

Got to get the texture and flavor absolutely right

Team the Onion Upma with a Pesarattu to make your day bright

Chop some Onions, Chillies, Curry Leaves and Ginger

In a pan, add some oil, add a spoonful of Chana and Udad, Rai and stir

Add the chopped vegetables of choice to the seasoning

I tell you, this is just the beginning

When the onions are translucent, add semolina gently

After a quick roast, add water while stirring quickly

Make sure there are no lumps and Upma is an even mix

Adding a dash of oil, at this point, is the secret taste fix

Squeeze in a lemon and Upma is ready

In a jiffy, with Achar it is finished already

T-Tamarind Rice

 

In this series, I will write about South Indian Food – Typically Telugu food

#SouthieSaga – Tamarind Rice

A Tangy, Spicy, a bit sweet, an eternal Andhra Rice Speciality

No festival is ever complete without this dish ‘oh tasty’

Take super Sona-Masuri rice, boil to perfection, adding salt and oil

Squeeze some tamarind juice, give a quick boil

Now comes the perfect seasoning

A test of your deft cooking

Add some oil to pan, then Chillies, Cashews, MoongPhali

Stir them and add little Chana, Udad, Rai and stir carefully

The final twist is the fragrant Hing and fresh Curry-leaves

Add this hot tadka, tamarind juice to rice grains

Eat hot or cold

“It tastes Yum” You will be told

S-Sambar

In this series, I will write about South Indian Food – Typically Telugu food

#SouthieSaga – Sambar

Sambar, a delectable gravy dish

That I with all my senses, truly relish

A silent partner to an Idly, Dosa, Vada, Ootappam or the humble Rice

You should have it super hot, with crunchy fries

Boil the washed Tuvvar Dal, giving it a couple of whistles in a pressure-cooker

In a hot pan, add some ghee, jeera, methi, Rai, hing, curry leaves and watch them splutter

Add chopped vegetables of your choice and  give a quick stir

Add Tamarind water and after one boil, add dal and a spoonful of Sambar Masala, MTR

 

Rice and Sambar makes for a great Sunday lunch

Try this recipe, You will enjoy, that’s my hunch

 

R-Rice

 

In this series, I will write about South Indian Food – Typically Telugu food

#SouthieSaga – Rice

Be it the stimulating Sona Masuri or the fragrant Basmati

Surely makes you forget all about Parantha and Roti

Team up hot Rice with Dal, Dahi, Chutney, Achar

Sabzi, Kootu, Qorma, Avial, Charu or Sambar

Turn this humble rice into a veritable Pulao, a delectable Biryani or a Tangy Tahri

A perfect partner to Subz-E-Tandoori

Or simply wash the grains and boil them to perfection

Forget weight woes, just tuck away to your complete satisfaction

 

 

 

 

Q-Qorma and Puri

 

In this series, I will write about South Indian Food – Typically Telugu food

#SouthieSaga – Qorma

A rich gravy made with desiccated coconut, soaked cashews, khus-khus, saunf, cloves, ginger

Some roasted chana dal, coriander seeds, jeera, chillies, garlic, cardamom and pepper

Roast the above, grind to paste

Add some curd to bring out the taste

Fry some chopped onions, curry leaves till translucent, add the chopped tomatoes and some veggies sublime

Add the masala, dry spices, give this a quick stir, add water and cook for sometime

Garnish with  chopped coriander, serve hot with puri, roti or rice

Add some pickle too and watch everything finish in a trice

 

N-Nimmakaya

In this series, I will write about South Indian Food – Typically Telugu food

#SouthieSaga – Nimmakaya

Nimmakaya or the tangy, spicy lime pickle

Will give your juice buds a mighty tickle

Cut cleaned and dried lemons into small quarters

Marinate them in salt and turmeric for three days, for starters

Heat sesame oil in a wok, splutter some mustard seeds

Cool the oil, add asafoetida and dry roast some fenugreek seeds.

Pound them, add marinated lemons, chillies, rest all, to the oil, give them a mighty stir

Serve this with curd rice, promise you, heaven is in your kitchen sir!